I loved this essay SO much and have so many thoughts about it. I think it was in Braiding Sweetgrass that Robin Wall Kimmerer said there are indigenous cultures where how rich you are is defined by how much you give to others, which really resonates with me. Maybe it's because I grew up in a small rural town but I'm just really not that impressed with ostentatious wealth. One time when I lived in New York, a guy got mad at a bar when my friends and I weren't chatting with him and yelled at us that he made 300k a year...to which we were like, well seems like it's made you very happy...
This timing is also so funny because I'm currently reading Your Money or Your Life, and a big part of the first chapter of the book talks about how money, and more specifically materialism, has warped our society. They've found in studies that no matter how much money someone has, they *always* say they'd be happier or more satisfied with more, even if they have more than the person sitting next to them. Really makes you think
Also the footnote really made me lol. I think it was in Gossip Time that I saw this but apparently a lot of the celebs who attended know Lauren Sanchez more because her ex was in the entertainment industry. And Sydney Sweeney being there was probably more related to her having acted in Amazon/MGM films. So so funny
Thank you for reading, Courtney! Braiding Sweetgrass has been on my TBR for a while now. I absolutely resonate with that as well. There's an artist I follow on Instagram who draws adorable comics, and one of them speaks to that same idea of being "rich" in connection/community/peace: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4n-OJUKrba/. Also, that guy in NYC is likely why they say "money can't buy happiness" – yuck!
Oof that realization is so tough but so true, unfortunately. It sucks how much of our society revolves around "more more more." I also think about how cheaply things are made these days every time I go into a museum or somewhere with older items that still function as well as they did when they were brand new, even after all the time that's passed.
Oh interesting! So it sounds like Jeff really doesn't have many friends after all 😂
That comic is soo sweet 🥹 and so true! New fave insta account unlocked. And highly recommend Braiding Sweetgrass! The essays were dense and meaty, so I ended up reading one every couple of days and let it marinate before moving onto the next. Such a special book
Ugh yes so so true. I think of how cheaply things are made too when I walk into a walmart or target and see those huge bins full of disposable containers etc and think of how many are sitting across how many cities across the US, let alone factories overseas. It's enough to make you go 😵💫
Isn't it?? The artist says her comics make her tear up, too, which makes it even more endearing 🥹 That's good to know about Braiding Sweetgrass, too! I think I'll take that same approach when I read it.
Yes, oh my gosh, I think about that all the time even though I try not to because it gives me the deepest, most visceral anxiety 🥴 It's so overwhelming and awful
You are not alone! The anxiety is so real. I just read a book about climate change that you might like, called Not the End of the World and it was super interesting! Gave me lots to think about with the climate crisis and helped reframe some of the conventional ways we think about it (though I'll be honest, too, and say I didn't necessarily agree with everything in it)
As a child of immigrant parents who left their respective countries and had to fend for themselves without a support system or Financial means, and spent their entire lives scraping by, all while raising four children, money or the lack of, played a pivotal role in all our lives.
I have no regrets about how I was raised. I had everything I needed: love, a roof over my head, food on the table, good health. The rest is all gravy. I’ve kept this mentality.
I think people who have inherited wealth are coming into life with a huge deficit because I honestly don’t know how they can relate to those who are not as fortunate as they are.
People who came from nothing and worked their way to the top may be “more human” as at least they experienced hard times.
Love really is the most important. If you have that, you already have so much, even if the world makes things harder without a lot of money. Nothing feeds the soul like love.
And I agree that people who are born into wealth have a harder time sympathizing with others. It really does seem like more of a deficit than a benefit when you look at it that way.
this is interesting! I never considered that money's effect really ends at that lower step of the pyramid! good thinking. That's why you're the CEO lol
This one is a mike drop ! I think I am becoming a better person (more focused on the quality of my relationships, anyway) since I stopped being financially comfortable. Maybe it's because now I really depend on people (whereas I had the illusion in the past that I could do it all by myself?) and therefore relationships have a real value to my eyes ? You tell me.
Thank you for reading, Amandine! I can definitely see how that would be the case. I felt the same way when I quit my corporate job and was still getting used to freelancing.
Oh my gosh, no way! I hadn't heard that but will have to look into it!!
What a great topic, Lauren! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
The part about addiction made me think about the hedonic treadmill, and how we always want more, more, more. It’s so conditioned in us it’s hard to fend off—a friend recently got a new job making the highest salary she’s ever made and I felt a pang of jealousy when she told me, even though my salary, while lower than hers, is more than enough. And then I felt ashamed at myself for feeling that way versus an immediate happiness for her. Ugh!
Your point about giving money away reminded me of a piece I read years ago about a couple who has annual giving goals. (They’re no one rich and famous, just your average middle class couple.) Since then I’ve kept it in mind and have maintained a couple monthly donations, but I still like the idea of trying to increase my giving as my means increase. It’s (mentally) harder than it should be when our society prizes greed. I also think, as a woman, there’s an added layer of scarcity because when we can provide for ourselves without relying on a man, we don’t want to lose that. Thinking about gender dynamics layered in with the concept of money is a mindfuck 🤯😅
Annnnd lastly, I love that you point out money being a completely made up concept. I truly never thought of it so literally like that until reading Sapiens years ago - a great, mind-altering book!
I loved this essay SO much and have so many thoughts about it. I think it was in Braiding Sweetgrass that Robin Wall Kimmerer said there are indigenous cultures where how rich you are is defined by how much you give to others, which really resonates with me. Maybe it's because I grew up in a small rural town but I'm just really not that impressed with ostentatious wealth. One time when I lived in New York, a guy got mad at a bar when my friends and I weren't chatting with him and yelled at us that he made 300k a year...to which we were like, well seems like it's made you very happy...
This timing is also so funny because I'm currently reading Your Money or Your Life, and a big part of the first chapter of the book talks about how money, and more specifically materialism, has warped our society. They've found in studies that no matter how much money someone has, they *always* say they'd be happier or more satisfied with more, even if they have more than the person sitting next to them. Really makes you think
Also the footnote really made me lol. I think it was in Gossip Time that I saw this but apparently a lot of the celebs who attended know Lauren Sanchez more because her ex was in the entertainment industry. And Sydney Sweeney being there was probably more related to her having acted in Amazon/MGM films. So so funny
Thank you for reading, Courtney! Braiding Sweetgrass has been on my TBR for a while now. I absolutely resonate with that as well. There's an artist I follow on Instagram who draws adorable comics, and one of them speaks to that same idea of being "rich" in connection/community/peace: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C4n-OJUKrba/. Also, that guy in NYC is likely why they say "money can't buy happiness" – yuck!
Oof that realization is so tough but so true, unfortunately. It sucks how much of our society revolves around "more more more." I also think about how cheaply things are made these days every time I go into a museum or somewhere with older items that still function as well as they did when they were brand new, even after all the time that's passed.
Oh interesting! So it sounds like Jeff really doesn't have many friends after all 😂
That comic is soo sweet 🥹 and so true! New fave insta account unlocked. And highly recommend Braiding Sweetgrass! The essays were dense and meaty, so I ended up reading one every couple of days and let it marinate before moving onto the next. Such a special book
Ugh yes so so true. I think of how cheaply things are made too when I walk into a walmart or target and see those huge bins full of disposable containers etc and think of how many are sitting across how many cities across the US, let alone factories overseas. It's enough to make you go 😵💫
Isn't it?? The artist says her comics make her tear up, too, which makes it even more endearing 🥹 That's good to know about Braiding Sweetgrass, too! I think I'll take that same approach when I read it.
Yes, oh my gosh, I think about that all the time even though I try not to because it gives me the deepest, most visceral anxiety 🥴 It's so overwhelming and awful
You are not alone! The anxiety is so real. I just read a book about climate change that you might like, called Not the End of the World and it was super interesting! Gave me lots to think about with the climate crisis and helped reframe some of the conventional ways we think about it (though I'll be honest, too, and say I didn't necessarily agree with everything in it)
As a child of immigrant parents who left their respective countries and had to fend for themselves without a support system or Financial means, and spent their entire lives scraping by, all while raising four children, money or the lack of, played a pivotal role in all our lives.
I have no regrets about how I was raised. I had everything I needed: love, a roof over my head, food on the table, good health. The rest is all gravy. I’ve kept this mentality.
I think people who have inherited wealth are coming into life with a huge deficit because I honestly don’t know how they can relate to those who are not as fortunate as they are.
People who came from nothing and worked their way to the top may be “more human” as at least they experienced hard times.
Love really is the most important. If you have that, you already have so much, even if the world makes things harder without a lot of money. Nothing feeds the soul like love.
And I agree that people who are born into wealth have a harder time sympathizing with others. It really does seem like more of a deficit than a benefit when you look at it that way.
this is interesting! I never considered that money's effect really ends at that lower step of the pyramid! good thinking. That's why you're the CEO lol
Bahaha I suppose so! But it is interesting, isn't it??
This one is a mike drop ! I think I am becoming a better person (more focused on the quality of my relationships, anyway) since I stopped being financially comfortable. Maybe it's because now I really depend on people (whereas I had the illusion in the past that I could do it all by myself?) and therefore relationships have a real value to my eyes ? You tell me.
Also, I heard that Maslow's theory is now being considered as obsolete.Found an english link about that : https://www.verywellmind.com/updating-maslows-hierarchy-of-needs-2795269
Thank you for reading, Amandine! I can definitely see how that would be the case. I felt the same way when I quit my corporate job and was still getting used to freelancing.
Oh my gosh, no way! I hadn't heard that but will have to look into it!!
What a great topic, Lauren! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
The part about addiction made me think about the hedonic treadmill, and how we always want more, more, more. It’s so conditioned in us it’s hard to fend off—a friend recently got a new job making the highest salary she’s ever made and I felt a pang of jealousy when she told me, even though my salary, while lower than hers, is more than enough. And then I felt ashamed at myself for feeling that way versus an immediate happiness for her. Ugh!
Your point about giving money away reminded me of a piece I read years ago about a couple who has annual giving goals. (They’re no one rich and famous, just your average middle class couple.) Since then I’ve kept it in mind and have maintained a couple monthly donations, but I still like the idea of trying to increase my giving as my means increase. It’s (mentally) harder than it should be when our society prizes greed. I also think, as a woman, there’s an added layer of scarcity because when we can provide for ourselves without relying on a man, we don’t want to lose that. Thinking about gender dynamics layered in with the concept of money is a mindfuck 🤯😅
Annnnd lastly, I love that you point out money being a completely made up concept. I truly never thought of it so literally like that until reading Sapiens years ago - a great, mind-altering book!